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Student during our next steps fair
Meet Andrew: Learning to Be His Authentic Self Again
Erin Chien, Miriam Parent


‘Miriam gave me my son back.’

Andrew began eighth grade at a local independent school, after graduating out of a Montessori school. It was during COVID, and he went from a small school where everyone knew, loved and accepted him to a large school where he knew nobody. Add masking and social distancing to the mix, and it was an absolute disaster. Nobody wanted to be friends with the kid who was a little different, and Andrew didn't know how to initiate new friendships.  

On top of the social dilemma, he was suffering academically. None of his teachers were allowed to accommodate his learning disabilities, and his homework load was unreasonable. He was frustrated, sad, desperate and began to lash out in anger, which was not like him. He also stopped playing piano and drums, stopped doing art, basically stopped being who he authentically was. He put all of his time and mental energy into doing the large loads of homework that he was being assigned.

I could not allow Andrew to continue to be punished for his own suffering. I informed the director that Andrew would not be returning after winter break. So I was on the hunt for a more appropriate school setting for him, and I had very little time to find it.

It was actually the middle school director at his previous school who steered me in the direction of Miriam. He told me that he'd heard from a colleague in education that there was a new high school that served students like Andrew. I immediately called Miriam. During winter break, Andrew and I toured the high school and fell in love. He got very excited at the possibility of attending Miriam.

As I mentioned, Andrew had pretty much shut down. He had experienced what I refer to as "educational trauma" at his other school. There was the high expectation that a neurodivergent student must meet the exact same standards as a neurotypical student with no learning challenges. It took him a few weeks to settle in at Miriam, and for his fight or flight system to calm down. 

But once it did, he began to flourish. He absolutely loved going to school every day, and came out happy every afternoon at dismissal. And every single day that he's attended Miriam, for the last four and a half years, he's talked my arm off, all the way home! But not only did he thrive academically, with educators who strove to understand his individual learning needs, he also began to create again. Miriam gave me my son back.

I think my favorite thing about Miriam is how invested each teacher, staff member and administrator is in my son. They know him intimately, they appreciate his unique outlook on the world, and they frequently tell me how much they love hearing the sound of him playing piano echoing down the hallways. Everyone at Miriam loves and appreciates Andrew - not despite his differences, but because of them.

I believe that Andrew's favorite thing about Miriam is that there's never been a single moment when he's had to be anything but himself. He's been allowed to show his authentic self, which is something that the world outside doesn't always allow and appreciate. He has never felt the need to mask at Miriam. Everyone accepts and loves exactly who he is.

After graduating from Miriam, Andrew will attend Webster University, majoring in Sound Production and Engineering, a passion of his. He got a huge scholarship for his GPA at Miriam, and has already met and collaborated with multiple students and professors in his school and field of study at Webster. 

He decided right away that he wanted to live on campus, in the dorms, despite the fact that we only live 20 minutes from Webster. He said that he knows it will be a big challenge to live independently from us, but that he's ready to take that on.  

He knows that he's prepared and feels comfortable advocating for himself when he needs help. He has taken the initiative to enroll in the Reeg Academic Resource Center to address his learning differences and request accommodations, as well as the Counseling/Life Development department for weekly emotional and psychological support sessions.   

Andrew participated in a two-week adventure at Webster this month, and we couldn't be more excited for him! The program is called TAP (Transition and Academic Prep), and it's offered to students who have enrolled in the Reeg ARC. Typically, these are students who had an IEP or 504 in high school and would like to carry their learning accommodations forward with them to Webster. During TAP, students stay in the dorms for two weeks and participate in a full schedule that even includes a three-credit-hour psychology class covering topics such as executive function, study skills, organizational skills, time management, etc. 

The first few days were tough, but Andrew was able to work through his challenges. At this point, Andrew and the other students have now experienced the challenges of adjusting to college. He has relaxed into Webster, as the program took away the fear and uncertainty that comes with being away for the first time. Every bit of TAP is even free of charge!

Andrew is such a terrific kid, and it is so gratifying to see him spread his wings! Like most parents of neurodivergent kiddos, I’ve put my heart and soul into Andrew for 18 years. Watching him transition beautifully into adulthood is bittersweet - he’s exactly in the spot we’ve been working so hard for, but it also seems like yesterday that he was my tiny baby boy.
 

If this story sounds familiar, you’re not alone.

Many Miriam families come to us looking for a school that truly understands and supports their child. Often, their children are navigating ADHD, level 1 autism, anxiety, language processing disorders, or other learning differences, and they’ve found that traditional school environments simply aren’t built with those needs in mind. 

At Miriam, support isn’t something families have to advocate for to get. It’s built into everything we do through expert staff, a personalized curriculum, and integrated therapies. Every aspect is designed to help your child thrive. If you or your child is feeling overwhelmed or unsupported in a traditional school setting, Miriam could be the right fit for your family. Learn more about our admissions process here.

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