“My stomach hurts.” “I don’t feel good.” “I don’t want to go to school.” These phrases became all too common from our son five years ago when he was in third grade. It was becoming very evident that his school at the time was not meeting his needs. Academic struggles, limited resources to help struggling kids, teachers with limited background in helping kids with learning difficulties – all led to our son, Santos, just not wanting to be there.
Santos had been diagnosed with ADHD at age five, but with these experiences in third grade we decided to do further testing. In the summer after third grade, he was diagnosed with numerous learning disabilities. We knew we had to do something different for Santos. Our pediatrician had mentioned Miriam School, as her daughter had attended there.
After numerous visits to the school we concluded that this could be the place for him. There was just one thing…we lived in Ste. Genevieve, Missouri, at the time. This was 65 miles from Miriam, over an hour drive, one way. Were we crazy to consider this? Is this nuts? Would we really drive him to school every day to St. Louis, over two hours in the car every day? My initial answers to these questions were yes, yes, and no. The answer to the third question, well…
Our family vacation landed us in Durango, Colorado, that summer. It was a Thursday morning. School was starting in less than a week. Where would Santos go for 4th grade? From the hotel parking lot I made the call to tell the school that we wanted to enroll Santos for the year. The following Monday, we were at Miriam for “Meet the Teacher.” Our adventure was beginning!
For the next two years, my wife Diann drove Santos from Ste. Genevieve to Miriam every day for school. Our challenges did not immediately cease. Santos resisted at first. We still had stomach aches. There were numerous bathroom stops, numerous times a day, at numerous quick shops along the way. (Diann became an expert on all the amenities at every gas station between Ste. Genevieve and St. Louis.) Santos spent a lot of time in the office of Mary Cognata, Associate Head of School. Her loving, caring, yet firm way of dealing with Santos was immeasurable and invaluable.
Slowly but surely, Santos adapted. He became more and more comfortable with the school and staff. Eventually, he looked forward to going to school. With the help of Ms. C and all the teachers, his anxiety about school slowly and steadily subsided. He made friends and looked forward to social interaction with his classmates. Miriam became his school, his turf. What more could we as parents ask for? The environment at Miriam allowed him to relax and be in a state of mind that allowed him to learn. After his first two years at Miriam, we relocated to the St. Louis area.
I think I knew when I made the call from Colorado that Miriam would be a wonderful place for Santos. What I didn’t know then, that I know now, is how wonderful Miriam would be for Diann and me. We have gotten so much support and guidance from the teachers and staff, just as Santos has. It was such a relief to us to know that Santos’ educational, emotional, and social needs were being met. It was with great joy that we saw him begin to flourish and love to go to school. Miriam has become our school too, our turf. We feel part of the Miriam community.
Santos recently graduated from Miriam and is getting ready to move on to high school. At his 8th grade graduation, Santos received the President’s Award for Academic Excellence. Diann and I were so pleased, proud, and amazed! When we asked Santos what message he wanted us to put in the Miriam yearbook, he said “Stay Determined.” Diann and I looked at each other, somewhat taken back. What more could we have asked for–a lesson learned to last a lifetime.
-Submitted by Tom Loida